They are like oil and vinegar. You just don’t care about keeping in good shape when you are trying to figure out where your next meal comes from. All I can think is what a waste of calories the exercise is because it’s not making me any money.
I’m trying to think more efficiently with my energy usage. Even though, I still have little problem spending hours reading new things, exercise feels like a huge waste of time. I feel like my brain needs to be taking in a lot more information right now than my muscles. I am undergoing a huge swing in my opinion about the value of fitness.
If I absolutely had to do something different to bring blood to my muscles, I am more inclined to stretch out, since that takes fewer calories. I would prefer yoga over weight training now. The yoga is calming and helps me think more about my situation than weight lifting can. When I weightlifted, I could only think about my muscles.
The only kind of muscles that are important to me are my legs. I have a need to keep my legs healthy as they can get me from one job opportunity to the next one. I try to practice walking a little more, because I know of the importance of walking if I can ever get a job. Upper body strength takes too many calories to upkeep right now.
If I actually need upper body strength, I can build it up for a potential job. But in the mean time, building upper body strength works against my savings account. The greater my upper body strength, the faster my small savings account gets reduced.
If I was offered drugs for free, I would be more at risk for accepting that free handout. To acquire a drug, like heroin, would be a net gain in my disposition. Then, if I start consuming it, my addiction tendencies take over and I may crave it on a level never before experienced. At that point, an addiction would fuel me to find money to continue my addiction for a drug.
I have never gone this long without exercise in my life. I never worried so much how I am going to feed myself every day so much before. When I did go for long stretches without exercise in my 20s, I felt awful during that period of time. Now, it feels more normal to not lift any weights. I still have a desire to lift weights, but my logic is that it takes too many calories to support that habit.
I may have developed an unhealthy habit for exercising. There were times when I weightlifted every day, even twice each day. I would lift so hard that I desired sleep within an hour after the exercise from all the fatigue.
When I lifted a lot, my hunger was extremely uncontrollable. I would go through very large amounts of food in a sitting. Sometimes, I would even get a little sloppy with how I ate, because I just could put get enough to eat. I grabbed whatever was in my house. But I grab whatever is in my car.
I also can’t exercise much, because that can increase my risk for sweating. When I am unable to find a regular shower, then sweating is extremely bad. I have to keep my skin as dry as possible. I don’t want my clothes to collect too much funk from the performance of exercises.